Are We In Control?

As Leaders We Are In Control Of Two Most Important Elements

By Amina Hedayat Khalil

Leadership and Think Global Coach and Consultant

One day, a pandemic hit earth. Lockdown became the norm and people were scared. Their work shut down, schools shut down, offices of all kinds shut down, except for hospitals and make-shift hospitals were open.

With this pandemic’s initial shock and lockdown, people felt they’re out of control and so overwhelmed with new restrictions and new rules: Stay home. No gatherings. Wash your hands after touching anything and everything. Use hand sanitizer. No hugs. No hand shakes. No visits….. No…No.. No..

People felt they have no control on what was going on around them and within their lives. Many thought their rights have been taken away from them indefinitely because of all the policies and executive orders the governors were taking to curb the spread of the virus.

As the dust settled and the chaos slowed down, people absorbed the situation and began to think: What’s Next? Changes were happening. Working from home. Homeschooling the kids. Seeing family only via video calls. Follow so many precautions to move from one place to another.

Then, they started thinking deeper. What’s Next? First, to know they must be prepared, at any time of their life, for any disruption like this one. They thought about the different elements in their lives over which they have control, recognizing for them to build resiliency they want to become aware of what they can control.

In a virtual meeting with over seventy people from different professions, I asked: What do you have control over? The majority said what they do during the day: waking up in the morning, having breakfast, playing with their children, reading, cooking, etc.

This a great answer.  Let’s take it deeper. It boils down to two major elements: Time and Attitude.

First we talk about Time:

we have 24 hours per day. Well known! Dah! From the moment we wake up, we have hundreds, if not thousands, of thoughts swarming in our heads. The more alert we become the more thoughts we bring about.

We recognize fully that we have the choice to follow any one of those thoughts. Whether it is: oh my it’s going to be a wonderful day, a boring day, all the laundry piling up, the kids need to shower, work is becoming a pain, work is so convenient from home, the kids will enjoy the movie I’ll surprise them with, I’m worried about my friend who went to the beach.. she’s crazy, oh, I wish I went with her, ….. on and on and on… one thought after another.

Our time during the day could be shaped by what we choose to do and which thought we follow. We can spend more time doing our work or more time playing with the children. We decide what to do with our time. I made the decision to write this blog post and I could spend three hours on it or I can spend ten, depending whether I’ll allow my distractions to take me away from the computer or not. I control how much time I’ll spend on it.

We have the control and we have the choice. Our choice of where we will allocate our time and for what purpose. It is in our total control.

Now comes our Attitudes:

We have control over whether we will let our attitudes drive our day or we will drive our attitudes to spend the day we wish for. Again it’s our choice. We have control over our attitude in a way that we can change it in a split second. Let’s recognize that if we choose not to change it ourselves, then our loved ones who know us really well know how to make us change our attitudes.

If we are crabby, disgruntled, and mad, they say a joke, or remind us of a story that makes us shift to a new state and a new emotions. From being crabby to laughing. From being upset and disgruntled to being nostalgic and joyful. Our attitudes and our emotions can shift in a split second. See someone who is crying and tell them a joke. What happens? They laugh!

Tapping into what forms our attitudes, our wisdom and determination to handle the new normal, will make building our resiliency an easier task.

The most important point here is that we have control over our time and our attitude. The pandemic gave us the opportunity to learn a few things in life here and there. This is one of the most important lessons I’ve learned. Not only me, but all those of who truly got in touch deep within in them to understand what being in control is all about.

Taking this one step deeper. Why is this topic so important?

As a leadership coachI encourage my clients to always recognize how they are able to develop their inner leader by controlling their time and their attitudes. Self-leadership is the epitome of an excellent leader.

Want to learn more about self-leadership and being in control, check my leadership course and send me an email to have a conversation.

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